Dear Aunt Sassy,
My parents have been looking for a boy for me for quite some time and now they have finally found him. I have just talked to him a couple of times and I am not sure how to deal with this entire thing. I don’t really hate him but I don’t love him either. Our parents are getting impatient day by day and want us to get married soon. I am looking for a job and want to have work before I can marry this person about whom I know really little. My parents keep on telling me that I live in a dream land and my prince charming will not come out of thin air. All I want is a stable job before I can take this huge step. Am I asking for too much?
Highly Confused.
Dear Highly Confused,
It looks like you are not giving this guy a chance. Talk to him and find out what you really feel about him. As for the job, your parents are right, you will find it with the right set of skills. If this is the guy that you want to spend your life with, then you will have his support in your job hunt as well. Try circulating your resume instead of arguing with your folks. And are you sure that you are not just using ‘job hunt’ as an excuse to run away from this proposal? Ask yourself what truly is the matter. Money and financial stability won’t solve the ‘real’ problems that you might be avoiding at this time.
Love,
Aunt Sassy
Dear Aunt Sassy,
I am a 2nd year university student and I recently started dating this girl. She is absolutely awesome. I like everything about her, but there is a slight problem. I am the one who always calls her (from my cell phone) and I always end up paying for our date (from subway fares, to theatre tickets to dinners). I know I sound like a miserly guy but believe me I am not. I am working in the summer to save some money for my uni fee but somehow I am not saving any. I love her a lot, but this dating business is getting too heavy on my pocket. I don’t want to break up AT ALL, but I don’t know what else to do either. If I try canceling a date, it would look as if I am breaking the deal.
Please help,
Financial Trouble.
Dear Financial Trouble,
I am having concerns about the way you are developing this relationship. You sound more like a slave than her boyfriend and she sounds like a spoiled princess or even worse a university gold digger. If you love her as much as you claim then it should not be a problem to discuss things. You are a STUDENT and that is your prime responsibility. Try talking to her about sharing expenses; you guys live in North America and not a village in South Asia. Don’t make money your ego and talk about splitting bills. You will discover that communicating does magic to relationships and your pocket.
Love,
Aunt Sassy
